The landowner in Jesus’ parable went into the marketplace hour after hour; finding men there at the proverbial “eleventh hour,” he asked them, “Why have you been standing here idle all day long?” Turns out, it was a lack of opportunity rather than a lack of interest; when offered an chance to work, they were glad to take it (Matthew 20:6-7).
I fear some of us do not have an excuse quite so good.
A preacher colleague of mine messaged me on Facebook this week. He wanted to tell me I was on a list of people who have not claimed their big check from Such-and-Such Government Agency. After discovering that he did not know two of his own daughters, confirming my suspicions of a hack, I told him I had reported him to Facebook.
News flash: Eating two pounds of Awful Tasting Vegetable X every day may reduce your risk of heart disease by up to 40 percent. Isn’t that exciting? You’re changing your family’s dietary regimen even as you read, right?
Probably not. And for the same reasons I am not.
I confess, I will read the collections of stories about, for instance, the worst customer a food-service employee ever had. Then I’ll read one about the worst service anyone ever got from a waiter or waitress. And I find myself wondering, maybe these are just the same stories told from two different perspectives. Maybe they are equally insensitive, equally impatient, equally self-involved.
There is always another side to the story.
Children misbehave more when their mothers are in the room. That’s not just cynical anecdotal evidence talking; that’s science. OK, it’s fake science. The article I read acknowledged as much. But the logic behind the argument made a lot more sense that most of the so-called data coming out of the think-tanks these days.
Adulting is hard. I see T-shirts and various other paraphernalia that make this assertion. I don’t necessarily want to agree or disagree in this context. Instead I would like to point out the whiny nature of a so-called adult who would make that claim — and worse, pay money to broadcast his or her incompetence.
I had the “Impossible Burger” at yet another area fast food restaurant that will not pay me to mention their name. (What’s up with that?) Supposedly these burgers are so good that you will think it is “impossible” that they are meatless. And I have to say, they are as good as advertised. I took a bite of the patty by itself, and I ate the entire burger. It was by no means the best burger I’ve ever had (pretty dry), but I did not feel like I was eating “healthy.”
And that’s a good thing, because I wasn’t.
The decal on the side of the truck read, “Specializing in all types of exterior siding.” I scrambled for a pen so I could jot it down before the light changed. Inspiration strikes at odd times, and we must be ready.
Pick a lane, says I to the small business owner. Either is fine. Be a specialist. Be a generalist. But don’t tell people you are both.
A local fast-food emporium (which continually refuses to compensate me for all the publicity I give it) has a couple of yield signs in the parking lot. All traffic yields to pedestrians (thanks for that), and “before food” traffic yields to “after food” traffic. Makes sense. If the “after food” cars can’t go, they get stalled at the window. Then no one can go.
That leads me to Monday.
Once upon a time, there was a creature known as the Portuguese toothfish. When American seafood started trending, it seemed like a natural fit. The toothfish was large, tasty, and relatively easy to catch. A perfect pairing. One problem, though — turns out, no one wanted to eat something called a toothfish. So the powers that be decided it would be known instead as a Chilean seabass. Problem solved.
