An odd sort of boasting

ByHal Hammons

When grandmothers get in car crashes, immediately their loved ones are concerned that they might have broken something.  Unfortunately, Lee Redmond suffered ten breaks in hers, and she will never be the same again.

She broke her fingernails.  All of them.  And it’s no wonder, considering they were a combined 28 feet in length.  One thumbnail was an inch short of three feet long.  Those talons of chitin were enough to get her into the Guinness Book of World Records.  Considering she once turned down an offer to cut them off for big bucks on live television, it is reasonable to assume a big part of her personal identity died in that car crash.

She’s better off, we would say.  Much better, in fact.  She will be shocked to realize how much of an impediment those objects of boasting actually were.  But that’s easy for us to say; we place no value in such things.  (I assume I’m speaking for all of us here.)

But what would we say if we were called upon to cut off our sin?  Would we be so eager to get rid of something that is clearly not in our best interest?  Would we free ourselves of “the sin which so easily entangles us” (Hebrews 12:1)?  Or would we cling stubbornly to the very things that are keeping us from experiencing the life God has in mind for us?

May God give us the strength to break off our own bad habits — and do it in time for us to turn our attentions and favor in a more godly direction. 

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Rabbits, eggs, and the Lord’s day

ByHal Hammons

Rabbits and eggs are in great abundance this time of year.  And anyone who knows anything about the history of Easter knows why.  They are symbols of fertility.  The spring equinox has always been celebrated as the time that the earth is in full recovery from winter.  The earth has come back from the dead, as it were.  The pagans, who saw the earth as an entity to be worshiped, turned the equinox into an opportunity for revelry — and, typically, debauchery.  (Children, if you don’t know what “fertility” and “debauchery” mean, ask your parents.)  The Catholic church incorporated local pagan worship traditions as it spread throughout Europe many centuries ago.  Thus, the celebration of the rebirth of the earth became the celebration of the risen Lord.  (The Greek word in Acts 12:4 rendered “Easter” by the King James Version translators is the same word rendered “Passover” every other time it occurs.)

Personally, I like rabbits.  And I absolutely love eggs. 

Stories from the Road: An Internet-Free Zone

ByHal Hammons

I got behind in my work during my recent vacation.  That may not sound strange; getting away from work is kind of what vacation is all about.  But my “vacations” are not entirely work-free, in most instances.  I usually have a few articles and a sermon or two that need to be ready to go before I get home, plus I have my various online obligations and my regular, run-of-the-mill Bible reading.

Some of that had to take a vacation as well, though.  My parents’ internet service was basically nonfunctional. 

Knowledge

ByHal Hammons

Alton Brown is one of my favorite television celebrities, back from when I actually watched television.  I heard him talk one time about he and his young daughter watching the Mythbusters guys blow things up on their show, after which she turned to him and said, with attitude, “So, what did you do on your show today?”  Apparently, “Cutthroat Kitchen” wasn’t quite literal enough for the young lady.

Biscuits

ByHal Hammons

In the latest installment of This Week on Facebook, I present a meme: “Just imagine how great life would be if biscuits and gravy made you skinny.”

       Well, sure.  But why stop there?  Let’s wish that video games increased our intelligence, or alcohol improved our driving, or pornography strengthened our marriages.  The only difference is, I’ve heard people actually argue the last three.  Not even kidding.

Here’s the report from planet earth, though: Good choices are frequently painful choices, and indulgent choices are rarely good choices.  I am no stoic, but I must decry the rampant hedonism in our culture that has been sold to us as a tonic for what ails us.

Medicine tastes bad.  Exercise hurts.  Work wears you out.  And yes, tragically, healthy food is less appetizing than fattening, artery-clogging food.  Frankly, we should be highly suspicious when someone tries to tell us different.

But we do have a tendency to believe “information” that supports our indulgences.  Most of my brethren who have tried to get around the clear teaching of Matthew 19:6 and Matthew 19:9, for instance, have a divorce and remarriage situation very close to home.  The truth does not always hurt, granted; however, it doesn’t become less truthful when it does hurt.

God’s word is truth (John 17:17).  Our current understanding of it may or may not be truth.  We owe it to ourselves to be honest — painfully honest.  If it means giving up a tasty morsel or two, so be it.

 

Improvement

ByHal Hammons

Mark Twain is quoted as saying, “Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.”  The point, I think, is that we should strive to be getting better all the time, rather than sitting around waiting for a magic pill that will get us to the finish line instantaneously.