Excuses

Why do women cheat on their husbands?  Several of them “confessed” in one of those slideshow testimonial things I keep saying I’m not going to click on.  Just say no to Facebook, Hal.

Anyway, the responses varied.  I was in a bad marriage.  He cheated first.  I was lonely.  I was confused.  I was unappreciated.  I was drunk.  I was sick.

Here are some things I did not see.  I was selfish.  I was weak.  I was cowardly.  I cared more about my feelings than my family. 

I don’t doubt that there is blame to go around in most cases of infidelity.  But I have little patience for those who say, ‘I’m not making excuses,” and then proceed with a litany of excuses.  And I have no patience at all for blaming the victim.  Are there factors that contribute to sin?  Of course.  Are they legitimate excuses?  Of course not.  So why are we bothering?

And this goes for any other sort of sin you might want to mention.  Uzzah had a good excuse (2 Samuel 6:6-7).  So did Saul (1 Samuel 15:20-21).  Even people who act in ignorance are still expected to repent (Acts 3:17-19).

Let’s be honest with ourselves.  We make excuses so we can excuse ourselves.  (Note the similarity between the two words.  I’m college educated, you know.)  Excusing ourselves means you don’t have to truly apologize.  You don’t even have to stop sinning.  You can keep blaming your surroundings, your loved ones, your upbringing, and whatever and whomever else you think are culpable — all the way to the gates of hell. 

I’ll be praying for you in the meantime.